It's a bit of a joke how tricky it can be to navigate the live amateur stand-up comedy scene in Melbourne, so I created a C.O.M.E.D.Y Tour which begins in Bourke Mall and ends with a polemic of a punchline.
I'm a Mistress of Mirth having written, performed, researched and taught stand-up comedy for many years and together with millions of other women across the globe we have enacted a mirthful mutiny taking on the unwieldy and historically or is it hysterically? male dominated world of stand-up comedy.
Woven with comedy fun facts and darkly funny short stories The C.O.M.E.D.Y Tour, like all good jokes is concise, clever and takes you somewhere completely unexpected.
C.O.M.E.D.Y is an acronym for Call Out Male Entitlement Daily Y'all
Once more.
Out of our houses
Onto the street
Into cafes bars and shops
Something has passed
Something lost
Something found
The introspection
Unbearable
Ubiquitous
Unavoidable
The tasks we set ourselves
To occupy our time
The books we read
The games we played
The sunrises and sets
Seen
To remind us that
Awe and wonder
Still exist
We have come out once more
To the rattle of trams
To the smiles of others
Something has passed
Something lost
Something found
We know
We will run to ground
Again
Have to shut our doors
And watch the viral shadow
Loom
Large
Luminous
Something has passed
Something lost
Something found
The plans we made
The people we miss
The space beneath our feet
Something has passed
Something lost
Something found.
Tousled black curls
You don’t know how good
They look
The lustre not yet faded
The swell of your belly
Fecund in its prime
You don’t know
Yet
It will swell
Again
Years later
You don’t know
Those lips that have kissed
Will
Want beyond imagining
Years later
In a silent room
You don’t know
That in time
The swell
The curl
The lips
Will loose
Their shine
Then in a blaze of sunrise reds and orange
It dawns
On you
That you should have
Could have
Would have
Loved yourself more
In those moments
Because now
The curls fuzz
In shades of grey
The belly balloons
In menopausal revoltk
And lips that have kissed
Seek forever more
What they can not
Have
Find
Desire
You do not
Can not
Know
As you walk along
The quiet street
Your black
Hair tousled in
Wondrous curls
Your belly
Swelling
With life
You do not
Can not
Imagine
Then
How much more
You should have
Loved yourself
From the moment
You pushed your way
Out of
Her
Into the world
You should have loved yourself
From that moment
Then.
Looking back on it now
It's startling how love can take a vice like grip on you...
Love sick
Love lorn
Love
Is
The
Drug
I lost my mind
Nearly jumped in front of a train
Drove through back streets
Wanting to crash the car
Just to feel something other than longing
Spent time
Wasted time
Wanting him
His intellect
His gaze upon me
His desire for me
Looking back on it now
In the coolness of a winters evening
I see myself
As he saw me
There are people who come into your life
Arrive
Like a hurricane
And I'm so pleased
I got a category five.
I see myself now
as he did then
The parts of the city
We inhabited
I became myself
I became
Love ..
